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When Reality Does Not = What You Planned

Writer's picture: Sharwin BoneySharwin Boney

As the end of the year approaches, we are faced with the realities of what did or did not happen in 2013. We are faced with truths that either we met our budget or did not or we earned money on an endeavor or we did not. The realities sometimes do not match our plans. It is during those moments that we choose to give up, give in or stay the course, tweak our strategy and forge forth.


I’ll never forget a few days ago when I went to pick up my son from basketball practice. This is his first year playing any kind of organized sport. As he approached the car, he looked fine. His face was straight. As soon as he got seated and the door closed, he began to cry. I mean the kind of deep gut kind of cry. I started to drive off all the while thinking if someone hit him or did something that warranted these tears, I am turning around and there was going to be trouble.


He finally said that everyone had to run a number of suicides within 45 seconds and he was the only player that could not do it within the allotted time. He was hurt because he couldn’t do something everyone else was able to do.


How many times have we disappointed ourselves or found our capabilities were in a box that needed to be expanded?


How many times have we started a task only to find that the task was beyond what we could realistically offer at that moment? How many times have we said we were going to do thing s differently only to find that today still had the face of yesterday?


I did not have any fancy words for Joshua at that moment. I did not have a bible scripture or a prophetic word for him.


I was, however, grateful that he had enough sense to wait until he was within the safety of mama’s presence to break down. Because you know everybody can’t handle our tears. Everybody don’t have the insight to see you cry and still see you strong, still see you as the giant you are. Giants cry. Leaders cry. There is no weakness in tears unless you choose to stay and swim.


Our family has faced adversity. Our business has not performed well in some prior years. Our lives have not been void of naysayers.


So I told Joshua what I say to myself, to my kids and now to you “ Cry for a moment, if you need to. But soon after, we get up, dry our tears and we work. “


Over the past 2 years I have heard myself say that often to myself and to my kids in the face of naysayers and circumstances that appeared to be insurmountable.


“ We work.”


We work to push through, get through. We apply ourselves. We push. We forge forward. We do not quit. We do not give in. Yesterday might have looked like a buster but surely tomorrow holds promise.


Your business might not have grown the way you had hoped. This year you might have put on more weight than you wanted or you might not have hit the financial goals you planned. You might be in more debt than last year or maybe you did not get the promotion you was hoping for.


Whatever it was, find somewhere, somebody that is safe and cry for a moment if you need to. I mean the deep gut kind of cry. Soon after though get up, get going and yeah let’s work.





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During the span of 23 years, Sharwin has served as Accountant, Chief Financial Officer, Business Consultant/Coach and tax advisor for businesses that joined the BoneFide family. In these roles, she has managed millions in dollars in revenue and has established back-office systems and processes that have worked to scale businesses, improve profitability and streamline day to day back office functions. She has represented numerous individuals and small businesses before the IRS. With a proven track record in getting things done, Sharwin hopes to hear from you.

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